Everyone’s experiences of grief are unique to them and it’s important thing to do what feels right for you. But there are things you can do to help you cope with your loss, as well as people and professionals who can support you through your bereavement.
When you lose someone close to you, it’s normal to want to cut yourself off from others and retreat into your shell. But this is no time to be alone. Accept emotional and practical support from others. Even when you don’t feel able to talk about your loss, simply being around other people who care about you can provide a great source of both comfort and support.
The death of a loved one can cause a lot of upheaval in your life, so it’s best to keep everything else as normal as possible. Avoid making any major changes or big life decisions, such as moving, remarrying, changing jobs or having another child. Give yourself time to adjust to your loss.
Try to stick to your normal routine as much as possible. Pursuing your hobbies and sports can bring you a sense of purpose and comfort following the upheaval of bereavement.
Even when you have support from those closest to you, family and friends may not always know the best ways to help. Join support groups with other people who are experiencing a similar loss to you. By listening to other people share their stories, you can also gain valuable coping tips. If you can’t find a group in your area, online groups can also be extremely helpful.
It can help to plan in advance what you would like to do around important dates such as holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries, or prepare to spend it with people close to you.
Finding little ways to celebrate your loved one’s life can help keep their memory alive and provide comfort to you as you move through the grieving process. A simple act like lighting a candle, visiting a favourite place of your loved one, or planting flowers or a tree in their memory can be particularly rewarding, and help with the healing process.
Grief can take its toll on your physical and mental health. It’s really important that you eat and sleep well and get plenty of exercise. The intense emotions you’re dealing with can impact your immune system, affect your diet and sleep, and take a heavy toll on your overall mental and physical health. Immersing yourself in nature or spending time in green spaces can be a calming, soothing experience when you’re grieving.
Avoid drinking too much alcohol or using other drugs. While it’s tempting to use substances to help numb your grief and self-medicate your pain, in the long run excessive alcohol and drug use will only hamper your ability to grieve.
If you’re struggling to accept the death of a loved one or your grief starts to feel overwhelming, confiding in a bereavement counsellor can help you work through emotions that may be too difficult to share with family or friends, and help you deal with any unresolved issues from your loved one’s death.
Be patient with yourself if you have difficult days. It can take months or even years to absorb a major loss and accept that your life has changed forever.
It takes time to fully come to terms with the impact the loss of a loved one can have. Understandably, you never stop missing your loved one, but the pain does ease in time, and eventually allows you to continue with your life.
